This might sound like a downer, but I’m kind of a depressive, and for me that just means that it kind of hurts to be alive.
It just sucks that you kind of have to do each day, and you have to keep doing the next day, and moments start hurting sequentially. When I’m bombarded with information and stimulation, I can always fill that need every time. I feel like I’m getting bored and I’m not happy and if I can do something really quickly and fill that need, I think I can confuse the issue and the subject and kind of not understand quite that the way I was feeling was deeper than I’m just bored right now.
It has something to do more with that I’m deeply distressed that life goes on.”